HAZIQAH!

Saturday, June 2, 2012

Hello peeeeeeeeepoooooooo! :)

Well, recently, I found out that the guy I like used to like me right back. But he didn't dare say anything because knowing me, I would have freaked out and ran away.Which is true la. Then, after like gazillion months, I finally stopped living in denial and admit to it. BUT of course, because this is MY life we're talking about, complication arose instead of a simple clear cut happy ending. He's confused over two girls. Just my luck; I'm too little, too late. What's worse is he can tell me this "Had you told me earlier, you would already be my gf by now". What a genius, right? Tell that to a girl who is already so regretful and sad -.-

But my theory is, we cannot dwell on 'what could have been' because it'll just drive us crazy. Like I said, ten billion times, all these is happening the way it is supposed to happen. Its all written. So what's the point in regretting being 'too little, too late'? It'll just make us/me feel worse right? So I shouldn't. But of course I've thought about it la. It all seems so stupid now, the fact that I was in denial for so long. But I mean, come on, that's so me. Had I not been in denial, I wouldn't be HAZIQAH. You know? :) Everything happens for a reason, we'll see one day. The lesson to be learnt will be clear for us all, one fine day.

How I wish I can fast-forward and see it all working out. Be it whether he chooses her and I'm happily moving on or him choosing me and we're happily together. But of course, it don't work out like that.

(Seriously, Bella, how can you reject Jacob? -.- He's so hot please)

I believe that I have to play fair in this. I don't believe in playing dirty to get what I want. Because at the end of the day, the hearts of 3 people are at stake. And though I really don't like the fact that I'm in this situation, and I'd really like it if she just disappear, and I do want the guy all to myself, and a happy ending if that's possible, I never want to wish for anything bad to happen to her. I don't wanna curse her to have her heart broken or whatever because it's just not fair. None of us wanted to be in this situation yknow? It just happened. It's unfortunate; a tragic love triangle and one person have to lose, I guess? But I really do hope that at the end of this, all 3 of us will leave this behind, happily. If he chooses her, I wish that I'll be in a happy state, have something good going on for me, meet someone new who'll be perfect for me and if he chooses me, I wish for her the exact same thing.

You know, I realize that I say things like "if he choose her over me" so casually, like as if the idea of that truly happening doesn't kill me a little bit inside. Pssshhhhh. Haziqah and her macho act. *major eye rolling*
But really, if it's meant to be, it will be :) Its all written. I have to keep that in mind. And no matter what's the final outcome, I know we will all survive and live through this :)

So dear competitor, good luck kay? I'm not good with competing and I usually just don't give a fuck and just give up but unfortunately, I'm not willing to go down without a fight. Not this time round. May this end well for both you & I. Cheers.

& 8:57 PM
Prince& his 1000 sexy sheeps